Posts Tagged ‘Excuses’

Letting Go of Excuses

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

Dolphins at Play… As I’ve experienced the Dolphins playing they often seem to behave quite mischievously, and it is difficult not to believe that they possess a real sense of humor and give much of their time to having fun.

Dr. Peter Evans points out in his book, “The Natural History of Whales and Dolphins”, that when young animals play, they are often learning important actions.  As I’ve watched them leap, flip, and spin in the waves it’s hard for me to imagine that they are having anything other than a good time.  Yet, Dr. Evans says their activities in the water may have a greater purpose than pure pleasure.

When Dolphins leap out of the water, it is often to see whether seabirds are gathering on the surface to feed on fish.  Noisy splashing jumps may serve to scare fish into a tight cluster for an easier catch.  Complex aerial practices that take place after feeding may be jumps for joy, but they may also serve a social function, such as establishing the bonding that comes from shared pleasure.  However, it is also true that these Beautiful Smiling Creatures sometimes play just for fun and they send out a real sense of joyfulness.

My new awareness, regarding the dolphin’s playful actions, reveals my inability to tell the difference as to whether they are having fun or their taking care of their personal and physical needs. Dolphins appear to be in gratitude in all areas of their life and enjoying themselves.

We have the ability to enjoy and be grateful in all areas of our life. We can look at our challenges as opportunities for learning and growth when we begin letting go of our excuses.  Accepting our self for who we are, strengths and weaknesses, means letting go of our excuses.  As we begin “unlocking our vision” we find the courage to let go of our fear of being judged or not liked. We can begin to let go of our guilt regarding choices that we make or where and how we spend our time.

Our excuses are harmful because they prevent us from succeeding.  Excuses put the brakes on our progress.  As we accept responsibility for our life, our choices, and how we spend our time our confidence and power return and we can accomplish anything we choose.

There is freedom when we begin to recognize where we are spending most of our time and why we make the choices we do.  We can then let go of our excuses and make shifts and changes in order to move forward.  We can begin to have better relationships, better communication, better health and well-being, better spiritual connection, and make better career choices.

Notice when you are making excuses this week and what feelings you are having.  What excuses do you make concerning your goals and dreams? What about places you’d like to go in life, things you want to do, things you’d like to accomplish, but somewhere along the way you came up with some good explanation of why you can’t have those things.

How we spend our time defines our life.  Notice in what areas you are spending your time this week. Are you willing to be with the truth instead of inventing excuses? As we become accountable in seeing the choices we make with our time we can then let go of our excuses.  We can break the habit of making excuses and the solution lies entirely within our own control.

You can have all the benefits of letting go of your Excuses.  You’ll take back your power giving you the freedom to make choices that benefit you.  You’ll be able to confidently make choices that support you regarding your money, your relationships, your career, and your free time.  You can be in your truth and be comfortable.

When you give up your excuses you’ll find clarity regarding your values, your beliefs, and what you want to commit too.  You can make choices based on your needs and wants and not someone else’s.  You will find the courage to take risks.  You’ll become authentic and move into appreciation of the life you have now.  You’ll gain the courage to ask for what you want, and with confidence and clarity you’ll move forward toward your dreams and your desires.

I’d love to hear your comments on “Letting Go of Excuses”…

Sending Love, Joyce

joyce@unlockingyourvision.com

678-380-7361

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Making Excuses

Wednesday, May 26th, 2010

Excuses give us permission to make choices that eventually will sabotage us in our work, at home, in our relationships, and many other areas of our life; which eventually will bring us  to the feelings of overwhelm, panic, anxiety, depression, and unhappiness.

This past month I had to stop and take a closer look at my excuses.  I was faced with some very challenging circumstances and, instead of using my Fearless Living tools, I returned to my negative thoughts.  For example: “why don’t I feel good, why can’t I get anything done, why is life so difficult, why am I feeling unhappy, why am I feeling so stressed and anxious, why am I afraid, why doesn’t anybody understand, and on and on”.

I had stopped my daily walks, I put off writing my newsletter, I ignored work that needed to be done in my business and around the house, I pulled away from relationships that I felt were becoming difficult, and I was skipping meals and eating in the evenings – which isn’t good for weight loss, restful sleep, and overall health.  When I stay in this place of making excuses for very long, the feelings of panic, anxiety, and depression return and I start to feel overwhelmed and unhappy with my life.

It continues to amaze me how our old patterns of behavior and thinking can return so easily.  I know in my conscious mind that when I begin making excuses it’s going to take me to a place I don’t want to go.  I also know the Fearless Living tools and concepts well and that they can take me out of fear and excuses, with ease and little effort, and back to where I want to be – in my freedom.  Freedom from anxiety, panic, depression, and feeling overwhelmed and unhappy.

In our subconscious mind we never get rid of those old patterns of thinking, but we do want to outsmart them.  That’s where the miracle comes in because in our conscious mind we can become aware of those negative thoughts; we can then choose to put our focus on shifting to better feeling thoughts leading us to better, more productive behaviors that feel good to us.

Once I became aware of my excuses, I began practicing my Fearless Living tools once again.  Within a few days I began to let go of my excuses and my negative thoughts were replaced with gratitude.  I started recognizing the blessings in my life and acknowledged what I was doing well.  I then shifted my focus to what I wanted to do and made choices that felt good to me.  I didn’t beat myself up, instead I was gentle with myself in acknowledging the negative place I had gotten too, yet relieved in knowing that I could make a different choice and put action behind it.

The longer we stay in fear and our excuses, the harder it is to get out of them. It’s like a mountain – It’s easy to climb down, but the farther you go down the harder it is to get back up.  We have to consciously choose to shift our thinking and actions even if it feels painful and difficult at first.  The results you receive are joy, peace of mind, calm, and you begin making choices that will take you where you want to go with ease and little effort.  You will become the person you truly want to be creating the life you want.  A life of happiness, health, peace of mind, and success.

Let go of your excuses this week and instead begin each day with gratitude and  acknowledge the things in your life that you are doing well, the things you like to do, and the people that you love and who love you.  Then begin taking small steps and set goals that feel doable.  Embrace the freedom and power that is already within you, and make new and rewarding choices no matter what your circumstances are.

Sending you love and gratitude, Joyce

I would enjoy hearing your comments on excuses

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You Decide if You Want to be Happy

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

You Decide if You Want to be Happy is something that I believed yet was confused by the fact that I allowed my circumstances to constantly get in the way of my being happy?  Circumstances that triggered fear; fear of not being lovable, not being good enough, and not being smart enough.  As I continued to allow the circumstances of my life to trigger the fear, my happiness became less and less, and unhappiness became my “state of being”.  Not because I chose it but because I didn’t understand how to stop it.  Fear was in control of my life.  In that state of being my feelings lied to me, my thoughts betrayed me as I rationalized and made excuses, and my actions became self destructive.

We all strive for Happiness in life.  Like many, I thought that achievements such as material things, money, the perfect marriage, education, family, a certain job, and financial/social status would make me happy, otherwise I must be less than everyone else.   Through my own pursuit of happiness I have learned that these achievements have little to do with my happiness or with my value as a person.  As I continued to live with my expectations of what happiness should look like it seemed to further escape my mental grasp and became even harder for me to express or define.

Happiness that came from my achievements, possessions, people, or temporary pleasures worked for awhile but eventually their power to deliver happiness faded.  The only lasting happiness comes from within each of us.  Sounds simple yet not easy to understand or do.

Life does throw us some uncomfortable and sometimes painful circumstances.  But as we begin to recognize that in these circumstances our life is continually sprinkled with ample opportunities for discovering happiness.  Circumstances provide us with opportunities to recognize how fear controls our life and our choices.  With this awareness we can then begin to make better choices to create the happiness that we want.  We begin to notice the little things.  A laugh, a smile, time with family and friends, time with yourself, giving or receiving a word of encouragement, a compliment, the joy that children, animals, and nature bring to us.  These are the treasures that enhance our happiness, not some grand achievement that only give us a lift for a short while.

I’ve learned that focusing on the present, accepting the life I have now, consciously recognizing the things I do have in my life to be grateful for, appreciating brief moments, small miracles, and choosing to recognize and acknowledge my little victories are the keys that move me towards my happiness.

People don’t choose to be unhappy, yet they don’t think they have a choice.  I didn’t believe that I picked that state of being, but I did believe that my unhappiness was a result of being wronged, feeling unworthy, less fortunate, and that I didn’t have control over this outcome.  I did acknowledge that something did happen to cause the feeling of unhappiness but the issue was that I had a choice in how I responded to what happened.  I could decide to stay unhappy or I could decide to accept that something did happen, feel it, allow myself to be in it, then make the decision to move on and allow myself to be happy.  I had to make that choice for myself.  When I understood that I actually could choose to be happy or unhappy, and that I deserve and have a right to be happy, it began to change my life.

When we are not experiencing happiness, the brilliance of our heart and mind, the essence of who we are is hidden under clouds of negative thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.  The concepts and tools that I teach in Fearless Living empowered me, not only in reducing the cloud cover but guided me to understand and embrace my true nature of being happy.  Fearless Living helps you to understand the complete freedom you have in choosing happiness and that you deserve nothing less.

We do have the power to control whether we feel happy or not.

Warmly, Joyce


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